As you read the story, keep in mind the possibility that everyone involved each had a divine role to play in accordance to a spiritual contract they “signed with one another” prior to incarnating on the planet.  They agreed to appear on the stage of life at a specific time to carry out their respective roles so that healing and spiritual growth could be facilitated.  When seen from a higher cosmic perspective, everything not only happens for a reason but a series of events unfolded exactly as they were supposed to.

Here’s what my dear friend Brandy told me over lunch at our favorite restaurant in town (Revelations):

A woman I know who is in her 80′s was at a family reunion where one of her nephews stood up and shared this story for the very first time.  No one, not even his wife knew about what he was going to tell them.   He is around 40 something now.  When he was a young boy of 13 or 14, he was getting quite good at diving and even had a shot of going to the Olympics.  One day, he was at diving practice at the high school swimming pool when a scouting coach spotted him and approached his parents to tell them that he thought their son had tremendous Olympic potential.  He said that he was in a position to provide him with top level coaching at a much more suitable training facility several miles away.

Since the parents were poor and didn’t have the financial means of providing daily transportation to and from those facilities, the coach offered the opportunity for the boy to come live with him throughout training.  Wanting nothing but the best for their son and excited about the possibility of him competing at the Olympics someday, they gratefully and tearfully accepted his offer and sent their son away to live with the coach.

What no one knew was that the coach had been sexually abusing him during the entire time they were living together (3 – 4 years).  Even though the boy felt so much shame and humiliation, he kept it a secret.   At one point the coach lost his job over sexual allegations but that didn’t seem to mitigate the increasing anger the boy felt inside.   As he grew into adulthood, the hatred he felt toward the coach turned into fiery rage, shame and humiliation, coloring virtually everything in his life.

The nephew tried to put it behind him by getting married and taking up a career unrelated to sports but the underlying rage refused to subside.  In fact, it reached a crescendo, threatening to overtake his sanity and completely ruin his life.   He couldn’t even bring himself to confide in his wife about what happened but he knew if he didn’t do something about it soon, he’d explode.

He decided the only way he could truly put this behind him was to forgive the coach for what he had done.  The burden of shame and guilt was getting to be too much.  It consumed every moment of his life.  The first thing he did after making that decision was to find out where he lived by searching online.  In the meantime, he somehow found out that the coach was actually dying of cancer.  His pulse quickened when he heard that.  He sensed there wasn’t much time left.  There was a sense of urgency.  He had to find him now before it was too late.

He called his wife one day from the office to tell her he was working late.  As soon as the clock struck five, he literally sped over to the coach’s house and rang the doorbell with visibly shaky hands.  A few minutes later, a very surprised but considerably haggard  coach answered the door.  After a few moments of stunned silence the coach finally let him in.   They went into the living room and sat down.

His heart pounding wildly, the nephew took a deep breath and reached for the man’s hands and quietly told the coach, “For years I hated you for sexually abusing me when I was a kid.  I carried around this heavy burden of horrible shame and guilt.  It got to the point where it threatened drive me crazy because I couldn’t stop thinking about it.”  There was a moment of uncomfortable silence before the nephew looked into the coach’s eyes and continued, “I just want you to know that I totally forgive you for what you did to me.  What happened happened.  Nothing we can do about it.  It’s time for me to move on with my life.”

Suddenly a dam burst forth from the coach’s tired eyes and he began to sob uncontrollably.  It turns out that he, too, carried around the heavy burden of guilt all these years.  After a few moments, the two embraced and the nephew went home.   On the way back home, he noticed how the dark cloud that hovered over him for so long was now gone.  He felt light years younger.  An involuntary smile formed on his face.  He checked himself in the rear view mirror and saw that he wasn’t imagining things.  He remembered thinking:   “Mission complete.  Now I can go on with my life.”

But the the story doesn’t end there.

A few weeks later the coach died.  Two years later, the nephew received the surprise of a life time in the mail.

It was a letter from the coach not only telling the nephew how much it meant to have been forgiven but that he was bequesting his entire estate to him!  What’s ironic about the ending is that the nephew and his wife had been trying in vain to conceive for many years without success.  Now that he inherited the coach’s estate, they were able to use the money to adopt two beautiful girls who became the light of their lives!

What do you think the moral of this story was?

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Finally at 2 a.m. we pinpointed the source of the problem and fixed it.  But that led to the creation of another problem that will have to be dealt with at a later time (i.e. my videophone no longer works – ACK!).

Putting things in perspective though, at least I’m back online!  (Image credit: Drama Mafia )

But that’s not the subject of today’s gratitude post.

You will notice the format to be a little different today.  That’s because I have one story surrounding the power of “what goes around comes around.”  I experienced an amazing situation of that theme this week.  The other stuff I want to share with you will be outlined in another posting – perhaps over the weekend.

But before I go into that, I wish to ask everyone for a moment of silence.  Randy Pausch, famous for “The Last Lecture” died of pancreatic cancer yesterday.  I was so incredibly inspired by this man who lived life right to the very end.  After the “last lecture” video went viral, he appeared on Oprah and inspired many millions of more people around the world.  Not long after that, Harper Collins published “The Last Lecture” that went on to be an instant best-seller.   While this is a sad moment in passing, I somehow know this man would not have wanted the world to mourn for his death.  He would have wanted us to celebrate the beauty of his and our own lives.  Thank you Randy for giving us what we so desperately needed – a reminder of the simple truths of life.  Thank you.  We will see you when we come home later.

Now turning to this week’s gratitude story.   Oh Good Lord, do I have something to share with you!

The incident happened yesterday.  After a good workout at the gym, I hopped into my car, started it, and scanned through emails on my “Crackberry.”  Once I finished responding to various emails, I set the BB down, put the car in reverse and began to back out.

CRUNCH!

OMG.

Yep – you guessed it.

Another fender bender on a parking lot!

But this time it was MY FAULT.

He had the right of way.

As soon as I felt the impact, I was like, “OH SH****T.”

I couldn’t believe it because you’ll recall about a month ago, almost the exact same thing happened to my car in another parking lot.  The only difference between the two incidents was that I was not in my car when it happened before.  If you’re new here and have no idea what I’m talking about, see A Fender Bender That Could Have Gone Wrong.

You all remember from that story how I found a yellow piece of paper that was taped to the driver’s side window, flapping in the wind.  It had on it the responsible driver’s name and her contact information.  You can imagine how grateful I felt upon seeing that note!  (Image credit:  lilly1975)

Someone led me to her inside the building, next to the parking lot.  This woman was clearly distraught, way more upset than I was.  Throughout the entire exchange, I kept a very calm, serene demeanor.  I kept telling her things like, It’ll all work out, thank you for taking responsibility and for being so honest about it.  I am very grateful to you.

Well, God bless her and her insurance company because within a week, my car was like new again.  You can’t even tell that someone hit me less than a month ago.  (BEFORE and AFTER photos can be seen at the above fender bender link).

Well, let’s fast forward to yesterday.  After I realized I hit someone, I got out of the car, half expecting the driver to scream a litany of profane words; but like how I behaved with that woman, he was remarkably calm and peaceful.   It was stunning display of the boomerang effect from the universe.  It was as if I was watching myself in a movie being replayed. 

Utterly incredulous.

Together, the man and I decided not to call the police and simply exchanged insurance information.   Like the above mentioned woman, I got right on the phone and called my insurance company to get the claim processed as quickly as possible.  I so very much wanted to continue to pay it forward.  How could I not, after what she did for me?

And get this………

Are you sitting down?

The location of the damage to his car was EXACTLY the same as mine a month ago!

Wait, there’s more!

The amount of damage to both of our cars were identical.

Food for thought:  Have you ever experienced the truth of “What Goes Around Comes Around” in your life?

Side notes:

1.  Be on the lookout for some more gratitude items in a future post; including a new corporate speaking engagement, a couple of new scripts recently installed for this blog (that you should most definitely be aware of), a newly upgraded version of the blog theme, a new Tweet-up event that I am coordinating with another Twitterer from the local area and more.   So much to be grateful for!

2.  You will note that the CommentLuv plugin no longer exists.  It had to be pulled for two reasons.  One is that it was parsing only some of your last blog posts but not others, giving the impression that I was being selective about it.   Thanks to Corrine Edwards for alerting me to this malfunction.

The second is because it was causing my WP database to become enormously bloated with worthless junk, which would have slowed everything down if I had continued to let it accumulate. (See Comment #28 at Upgraded: xMark 2.5 Released).

But all is not lost!  Commentators are still being “recognized” for their input because their names are still being linked back to their blogs (assuming they have one and filled in the URL box).   We also have the “Monthly Comment Champs” and “Most Recent Comments” sidebars, further giving you link love in exchange for taking the time to share with us your thoughts.  So the love is still there – okay?

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It’s miraculous how it came about because I almost didn’t take this one.

The culprit was FEAR.

The chain of events began back in September 2007 when I asked influential “Pick the Brain” (PTB) blog if they would accept an article from me on ways to resolve conflicts. To my delight, it was posted at PTB on September 24, 2007.

While the article generated a lot of visitors (I was at the old Blogger platform at the time) nothing major happened. But little did I know that it was making its way to the right people at the right places. It goes to show how the universe is constantly working behind the scenes to make your dreams come true. Nothing may seem to be happening on the surface, but there’s always something going on backstage.

The article somehow found its way to an engineer from a company based out of Latham, NY (coincidentally, that’s the town where I grew up). She was looking for a guest speaker to discuss ways of dealing with conflict at their annual January 2008 meeting. I think she googled “conflict resolution” and found my article at PTB.

Impressed with it, she decided to follow a link at the bottom of that article, which led her to my professional speaking website. Acting on intuition, she showed both of them to her boss, who apparently liked what he saw and asked that I be contacted via email.

They were looking for someone to conduct a workshop to discuss conflict resolution in the workplace, specifically dealing with difficult co-workers, subordinates and clients with a little bit of employee motivation thrown in. Would I be interested?

In response, I asked her to complete the online questionnaire from my website so that I could learn more about their event. When it revealed that the audience was going to be mostly foremen, superintendents, supervisors and engineers, my stomach tightened.

This was not my kind of audience, I thought. I usually speak to corporate salespeople, university administrators/students as well as spiritually oriented groups, to name a few.

Upon further research, I learned the majority of these men and women spent most of their working lives out on the fields dealing with the disassemble and repair of turbine generators in all kinds of adverse weather conditions, often putting them face to face with unreasonable clients, embattled employees and the like. All I could see in that audience were hard core, weather-beaten people with a groan written all over their faces.

A million thoughts ran amok:

• Will they dismiss my talk as nothing more than Pollyanna gobbledygook?
• Was this a test from the universe to see if I could turn down good money saying that the program was not the right fit for me?
• Or was it giving me the chance to pluck up the courage to take my speaking career to the next level?
• Would I be able I give a 3-hour seminar and deliver full value for the client when my specialty was giving much shorter keynote speeches?
• Could I reach into the soul of foremen, engineers and superintendents, all of whom have seen more their share of adversity on the fields?
• Was the feeling in the pit of my stomach telling me this was the wrong engagement or was it just plain nervous excitement?

One day I plopped down on my couch and said to God, “Please give me a sign whether or not this is right for me.” With that, I closed my eyes and became still for the longest time.

About an hour later, I opened my eyes and looked around the living room. I hadn’t heard or felt anything. But sitting right next to me was Divine Guidance, by Doreen Virtue. It was lying face down but spread open so that I would know where I left off. The book was beckoning me to pick it up.

Turning it over, my eyes were drawn to a paragraph that said something like:

Oftentimes people ask for opportunities and gifts from the universe only to push them away because their egos made them think they weren’t worthy or capable of the task at hand or that they don’t deserve the abundance it would bring them.

WOW!

I had my answer. Immediately drawing up the speaking contract, I emailed it to the client. Within 48-hours, I had a check in my hand for the FULL fee.

Throughout the weeks that followed, I worked diligently on creating a customized handout and put together a PowerPoint presentation. Day by day, I added bits and pieces so that I wouldn’t overwhelm myself with the enormity of the task at hand. Everything about preparing for this seminar was stretching the boundaries of my mind.

Shortly before I was to leave for Florida, I was ready, or so I thought. Even though the handouts were nicely bounded together and the PowerPoint presentation was safely stored on a flash drive, my heart was still pounding hard.

God smiled and understood. He had an idea that would set me straight.

After enjoying a delicious Mexican lunch with a couple of friends, we all went back to my place to hang out. Of course, the subject that afternoon swirled around the upcoming presentation and how I might use some of the well known YouTube videos to get my point across.

Suddenly in the midst of our discussions, my dear friend Joni made a chance remark that would turn everything around in a split second:

Stephen, all that is required of you is to show up and just be who you are. Be the authentic person that you have shown yourself to be and don’t try to be something you think those people in the audience want you to be. Just share your own personal stories with them and you’ll be fine.

OMG, that was HUGE! How could I have missed that? My Dad said basically the same thing a few weeks earlier while I was visiting family over the Christmas holidays.

For the first time since the contract was signed, I felt peaceful. Even so, I had a hell of a time trying to sleep the night before the engagement. I tend to get a little excited to the point where my mind goes into overdrive, trying to come up with better ways to give the presentation. My mind won’t rest until it’s over.

Peering into the hotel’s bathroom mirror the next morning, I noticed my eyes were slightly bloodshot but not enough to be noticeable. Thank God for small favors.

When I was about ready to leave the hotel room, I took a deep breath and sat at the edge of the bed. With my eyes closed, I imagined beings of light roaming around the ballroom, watching over me. I imagined them spreading love, uplifting and inspiring each person in there. In my mind’s eye, I saw everyone having a wonderful time. After several minutes of doing this, I was satisfied that I had done everything in my power to do what I was hired to do. With that, I got up, took another deep breath and walked confidently to the meeting room.

After the CEO introduced me, I immediately fell into the “twilight zone” where the words seem to tumble out effortlessly and I lost all sense of time. I felt imbued with an incredible sense of peace. Even the toughest-looking members of the audience were laughing, smiling and nodding their heads. Several came up to me at the break to share their own private stories with me.

In short, it was a success!

Here’s what I learned from this experience:

• God and the angels are like air traffic controllers who see on their radar screens where you’ve been, where you need to go and how to get you there. Asking for Divine guidance is like a pilot checking in with the tower. Your fears, concerns, problems and questions will always be answered – it is just a matter of listening.
• Break down the process of preparing yourself for an event into small bits and pieces and do a little bit each day. Don’t wait until the very last minute to put it all together. When you’re finished, just know that you’ve done the best you could and let it go. For instance, when I was done with the Powerpoint program, aside from the normal editing, I saved it to the flash drive and forgot about it. In the past I would have been obsessed with making it perfect, constantly fixing, changing and updating the program right up to the very last minute.
• You can’t go wrong with telling stories from your own life’s experiences. When people hear a powerful story about your life, they’re able to relate to you, regardless of how “hard core” you might think they are.
• In fact, don’t prejudge anyone on the basis of their titles. They are all spiritual beings having a human experience, just like you. If you speak or act from the heart, regardless of how you look or sound, most people will welcome you with open arms.
• Trust is all that is required of you if you’re guided to take a particular step forward. You do not need to see how things will play out in the end.
• You will never be guided to do something that isn’t right for you but at times you will be asked to push yourself to your true potential.

Food for thought: Are you allowing yourself to be who you truly are in whatever you’ve been called to do?

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I’d like to add to that, “authenticity and integrity.” A person who genuinely cares about the needs and wants of others are going to increase their “likeability factor” several notches higher. It is this person who will succeed because they recognize that it is human nature to feel good when someone else is genuinely interested in them first.

There’s nothing wrong with getting what you want. In fact, ever since you were born, you’ve been in a perpetual state of wanting something for yourself. It’s human nature but the secret is giving what others want FIRST before you get yours. And in my view, authentic people know exactly how to do that.

Just what constitutes an “authentic person”?

1. Great Listening Skills: Everyone, regardless of who they are, want to be acknowledged, appreciated and loved. People want to feel important and respected. How do you give them that? Well, when you are in a conversation with another person, are you truly focusing 100% of your attention on what the person is saying? Or is your brain formulating something to say at the next possible opportunity? Or are your eyes roaming the room, wondering who else just walked in the room? An authentic person’s attention is razor sharp, enabling the listener to see the other person’s point of view.

2. Fair and Just Treatment of Others: When carrying out your role, regardless of whether it be a mother, business executive, pilot, waitress, teacher or coach, to name a few, you are always dealing with other people. The biggest secret is how you treat them. Do you treat others with respect or are you condescending, especially if they screwed up? I once read a very interesting account of something that happened to famed aerobatic air show pilot, Bob Hoover. He was well known for purposefully shutting down both engines of his plane in various configurations and heights, always landing safely.

One day he was performing at an airshow when 300 feet above the ground, both engines unexpectedly quit. He immediately knew the plane had been misfueled and who had done it. Upon finding the quivering line boy, what did Bob Hoover do? In the eyes of everyone else, he had every right to angrily eschew the line boy because it could have cost his life. Instead, he put his arms around the tear streaked kid and said, “To show you I’m sure you’ll never do this again, I want you to service my F-51 tomorrow.” Imagine that! That’s one truly authentic man because rather than belittling the young kid, he approached it from the point of view of respect and love. Do you think the line boy forever learned his lesson? You decide.

3. Having Integrity: Everyone wants something. But authentic people are conscious of the operative watchword: integrity. They will do the ethical thing even if it means a loss of personal benefits for themselves. Consider a doctor at a major hospital who advises the parent of a small boy (I saw this in a movie but can’t remember the name of it), to have major, life-threatening surgery. After much research, the mother learned of a non-invasive treatment available at another hospital several miles away and vigorously sought for his release. The doctor refused, telling the mother she had to go through several legal hurdles for that to happen. One of them involved bringing in another qualified physician from the outside to come in and sign a written statement testifying to the validity of the other treatment. Even though the mother satisfied that requirement, the treating physician refused to budge and fought like crazy to keep the boy there. Eventually, he relented. It turned out that the alternative treatment ended up saving the boy’s life. A truly authentic doctor would have seen that possibility rather than blindly serving his hospital’s and ultimately his own needs.

4. Ability to Communicate: Growing up deaf made me acutely aware of the importance of communication. I was often left out because I was not always in a position to catch what other people were saying. This often resulted in me being the last to learn about something everyone else already knew about. I hated nothing more than the feeling of being left out in the cold. As a result, I grew up very sensitive to how others might feel in a similar situation, regardless of whether they were hearing impaired or not. Because of that, I make every attempt to keep people in the loop whenever necessary. Business leaders who conscientiously communicate in the open, especially when there is a lot of uncertainty hovering over the future of their employees, end up earning tremendous amount of trust. Rather than hiding behind the cloak of their boardrooms, they step up to the plate and keep people informed as much as possible. Everyone from the top down knows what is going on and are therefore in a position to make informed decisions. Authentic people make themselves valuable because they care enough to keep others in the loop.

5. Willingness to Show Transparency: Public speakers who aren’t afraid to stand up on stage and speak from the heart, showing their childlike enthusiasm rather than presenting themselves as flawless packages, often win the hearts of their audiences because it makes them real, just like them. Authentic speakers go into a speaking engagement with the attitude of “I am grateful all these people are spending time with me and I will give them a reason to laugh, cry and otherwise enjoy themselves without worrying how I look.” Inauthentic speakers will say, “Well, there’s a bunch of jerks out there, I’ll just get in there, get it over with and fool them senselessly with my appearance of great success.” Speakers who are willing to be transparent win the love and respect of their audiences.

Food for thought: Authentic people make more friends in two weeks by becoming interested in other people than in 2 months by trying to get other people interested in them!

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Do you consider yourself a likeable person? Tim Saunders, a former Yahoo executive and popular business speaker, made “The Likeability Factor” a household phrase with his best-selling book of the same title. I haven’t read it but I heard it was a good read.

While your expertise certainly helps, that’s not why people ultimately do business with you. All the advertising in the world might get you some attention in the beginning but it’s usually a waste of money in the long run. While a lot of businesses seem to be offering similar products and services, I still stand by my article, “There’s No Such Thing as Competition.” What makes you stand out is your likeability factor.

People do business with you because they like you. How you relate to others is now more important then ever. If you exude a personality that exhibits any degree of the likeability factor, they will want to work with you not necessarily because your products and services are any more colorful, functional or superior. It’s not what you know but how much people like you.

Are you an upbeat individual with a firm handshake and a genuine smile? If so, they will want to be infected with your positive energy. Are you someone who’s articulate, a good listener and one who shows empathy for others? Then people will want to do business with you because they are buying YOU. They want a bit of that essence you exude and take a little piece of you home with them.

Look at what happened with Bill Gates. He dropped out of Harvard to start Microsoft with buddy Paul Allen. At one point, IBM asked them to create some kind of DOS program. Do you think IBM was asking them to do it because of their “expertise”? They were two young geeks at the time for goodness sake! They actually had no clue on how to do it but IBM commissioned them to create the program anyway because their likeability factor was very high. The rest is history.

Yesterday, I went into the Pollack Studios in South Euclid, Ohio to have some new pictures taken for this blog, my speaking website as well as new business cards. Wendy, the “Goddess of Networking” introduced me to him. The first thing I remember was the way Mr. Pollack shook my hand with both of his and how he looked at me squarely in the eye with a kind smile on his face. Throughout the photo shoot, he asked me questions about my speaking business and genuinely seemed interested in me, taking time to stop what he was doing to listen and respond. He made me feel like the most important person in the world. By the time we were finished, I couldn’t help but wanting to continue to do business with Mr. Pollack because his likeability factor was very high. In fact, I liked him so much that I want you to know about him. If you’re in need of new photos (whether digitial or print), please stop by his website or contact him (216-381-2001 or drop him an email at JLPPHOTOG(at)aol.com). You won’t regret it.

Could I have gone out and bought myself a digital camera and done it myself? Sure. Piece of cake. With the invention of digital cameras, the photography business has been permanently altered. Investing in a digital camera these days makes almost too easy to bypass a professional photographer’s services. But Mr. Pollack has been able to stay in business by differentiating himself through the likeability factor.

Here’s my take on what makes your likeability factor go up:

1. You are the real deal. People want to be in the presence of genuine personalities. It’s easy to spot a fake person a mile away. You’re more willing than most to show the vulnerable side of you because you have no need to provide layers of insulation, pretending that you have “it.” People respect real people, not arrogant pricks who pretend to be high and mighty like the anonymous guy on the Internet who calls himself “The Rich Jerk.”

2. Your emotional intelligence is very high. You’re great at validating other people’s feelings and emotions. You really care about others and they sense that the moment you walk into the room.

3. People have no trouble understanding you because you are a conscientious communicator. You keep them informed, even when the news is bad or when you stumble and fall. It’s been proven that doctors who fess up their errors are rarely sued for gross incompetence as opposed to those who try to cover up.

4. You have superior listening skills. There’s nothing more exciting than to be truly heard. The eyes of likeable people are riveted onto you, making you feel like the most important person in the room.

5. You are comfortable in your own skin, giving others permission to be comfortable with you.

6. You have integrity, making it super easy for people to trust you. Would you buy from someone you didn’t trust?

If you have the likeability factor, you’ll have no trouble doing brisk business. People will be drawn to you like magnet because you are perceived to be a winner. They end up becoming your human advertisers, spreading the word because your likeability factor is quite high.

How cool is that?!?

Food for thought: How is your likeability factor today?

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How about you? Do you walk the talk? Do you find yourself doling out advice and then following it yourself? Or do you preach one thing but behave in a contrary manner?

One of the things I most admire in other people is their level of authenticity. Because I respect people of this stature and want to emulate this character trait, I am very conscientious of my own behavior and monitor whether I also “walk the talk.” If there’s anything that makes me want to vomit, it’s being in the presence of hypocrites. You can spot them a mile away.

A few days ago, I wrote “Pimping the so-called Competition.” In that article and another one (see here), I emphasized that there is no such thing as competition. Why? Because it’s all a matter of how we perceive things. It’s actually very smart business to help others out there, especially if their work truly inspires you. If you understand and respect the spiritual law of giving and receiving, then this concept will make perfect sense!

Mindful of the need to stay true to my words from the other day, I’ve decided to take the art of pimping to another level today. On the upper left hand corner, is a photo of a fellow self development writer, speaker and author that I’ve had the good fortune to become friends with recently. His name is Phil Gerbyshak from Make it Great!

While I’ve read a lot of Phil’s articles, there was one that touched me to the core, making me want to pimp the hell out of him. He wrote a beautiful, touching story of his experiences as a young boy who faced adversity along the way: “The Power of Positive Thinking.” You’ll find that he writes from the heart and shares his innermost thoughts, fears and beliefs, telling himself over and over again, “I can do it.” It’s worth your time to read it.

What did you think of it? Did it remind you of your own life’s experiences?

Food for thought: Do you walk the talk? Have you thought about taking the art of pimping to another level and telling the world about someone who truly made a difference in your life? Why not do it in an unconventional way, surprising, even shocking people?

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I just learned that a man who helped me make my dreams of becoming a pilot seven years ago recently passed away. While I understand most of you didn’t know him, I want to share the story of how we met and the incredible impact he had on my life. I believe and hope you’ll be touched even if you’re not a pilot yourself.

We could all learn how to give selflessly like he did. I don’t know whether or not he was aware of the universal laws of attraction and giving but he was sure a good model for someone who did.

Here’s the story.

Right around the turn of the 21st century, I was still in the process of building my speaking and writing career so I was looking for a part-time job to pay the bills in between professional speaking engagements.

It was also at this time when I was already a month or two into flight training but my original instructor was offered a new job in Colorado so I was forced to find a replacement elsewhere.

One day, I had an inspiration to visit other airports to see if I could get a job at a place where they taught people how to fly. I thought, “Why not? Might as well shoot two birds with one stone.”

After visiting one or two and being told nothing was available, I decided to venture a little further out and try Oakland Troy airport, a 30 minute drive from my home.

It was nestled among a fast growing metropolitan area (Troy, Michigan, USA) complete with a new strip mall, new apartments, a giant Wal-Mart and an assortment of other industrial buildings. The only area with open space was a small golf course nearby. The airport was big enough to accommodate corporate jets yet small enough not to require an air traffic control tower.

Pulling onto the newly repaved airport parking lot, I noticed a small circular white terminal building up ahead.

“That must be where I can find the personnel department,” I thought.

Upon setting foot inside, I was surprised to see only a couple of people milling about, drinking coffee and reading the paper. A jovial looking man with rosy cheeks was pouring himself a steaming hot cup of coffee.

Seeing that I was a new face in the place, he set his coffee down and came barreling toward me at 800 mph with an outstretched hand. It startled the heck out of me.

After regaining my composure, I made the mistake of accepting his bone-crushing handshake, causing me to wince in pain.

Trying to hide my pained expression, I said, “Hi, my name is Stephen Hopson and I’m looking for the personnel department.”

“And I’m Don Solms,” he boomed. He was still pumping my now lifeless hand.

Finally releasing his grip, he said, “Oh, you want a job here?” His face brightened even more, if that were possible.

“Yes, do you know of any openings?” I was massaging my fatally injured hand, opening and closing it repeatedly.

“I think they might be looking for someone. HEY, let me take you over to the other building to Susan’s office. She’s the personnel director. COME ON!”

Just before going in her office, Don thrust his business card in my hand and said cheerfully, “Good luck. Shoot me an email later. You’ll have to come over to my hangar where I keep my plane. Okay?”

Keeping both hands within the safety confines of my pockets, I said, “Thanks Don.” I could tell he wanted another hand shake. Fat chance buddy!

Susan then introduced me to two guys named Carl Barnes and Jason Zimmerman. They were both young men who were in charge running flight services. The interview went well and I ended up being hired. As a line service rep, I would be responsible for fueling and towing airplanes, among other things. It marked the beginning of an incredible 4 years at that airport.

One day, Don was hanging out at his hangar where he kept his prized Skylane. It was sunny and breezy. His hangar door was wide open, allowing cool air to swirl around inside. It was an open invitation to anyone who happened to come by. Spotting me in the fuel truck (I was motoring my way back to the terminal after fueling a customer’s plane), he waved me in and offered me a cold soda.

Ten minutes into the conversation, my dreams of becoming a pilot somehow surfaced. I told him that I was actually looking for a new instructor and was trying to save up some money to resume flight training.

Before he could respond, my vibrating pager distracted me with a new text message. There was another fuel order and I had to get going.

“Don, I’ve gotta go – they are telling me to fuel another airplane. See ya later!”

As I got up to leave, he grabbed my arm and gave it a powerful squeeze. My mind did a quick flashback to that day in the terminal. This time his eyes were sparkling like stars. And he was grinning stupidly.

I was in no way prepared for what he was about to say next.

“I would be honored to be your flight instructor and I won’t charge you for my time. All you’d be responsible for is the cost of renting an airplane.”

My God, an angel was in my midst and I knew it.

Absentmindedly rubbing my arms to stem the tide of goose bumps that was spreading like wildfire all over my body, I said, “Wow, really? Thanks man!”

Then he turned serious for a moment and said, “When are you free for your first lesson?”

Thrown off balance since I didn’t expect it to happen so soon, I said, “Well, how about tomorrow?”

“Okay, you got it! ” he thundered. Then he winked as if he were saying, “our secret.”

The rest was history. He was true to his word. Months of flight training with this man proved to be quite an adventure.

He was best known as a jokester, even in the cockpit. Now you have to picture this in your mind. There we were, me, a deaf student pilot and him, a 250 pound flight instructor with a large football frame who liked to poke his elbow at me every time he made a joke. And get this…he thought everything he said was funny!

Ouch!

Aside from his wry sense humor, he was one of the most patient flight instructors I would ever have. Every time we got ready for a lesson, he’d explain in the classroom what we were going to do and then we’d go up and fly.

If he wanted to explain something while we were flying, he’d take control of the airplane while I read his lips and then we’d resume the lesson. Don was one of those rare flight instructors who did not care about building flight time for a future career with the airlines. He was in it for the long haul. In fact, it wasn’t until after 50 plus years of flying and instructing that he finally hung up his wings last year.

He truly enjoyed the fine art of teaching and it showed. He never yelled at his students like some flight instructors who think they are drill sergeants with big egos. His students were his prized possessions and he treated all of them with the respect they deserved.

On December 3, 2000 Don had one big surprise up his sleeve. It was a calm, sunny day. We were scheduled to do some practice takeoffs and landings. After doing three of them, he instructed me to taxi over to the ramp by the white terminal building where I first met him months earlier.

Trying to hide his delight, he said, “Let me see your logbook for a sec.”

Arching my right arm as far back as I could behind the front seats, I snatched the logbook out of my bulging black flight bag and gave it to him.

Suddenly it dawned on me that today was “the day.” He was going to sign me off for my first solo flight!

I felt an involuntary shudder.

After scribbling his signature, he turned and looked at me. His brown eyes were sparkling again. The smile was even bigger than before. He was absolutely giddy, like a child on Christmas morning.

“So Mr. Hopson, are you ready?” he thundered.

“Yes, Don, get the hell out!” I thundered back, half joking.

Roaring like a lion, Don heaved his 250 pound football frame out of the airplane, closed and locked the door with a loud click. Then he did something that forever burned in my mind.

Like a five-star general sending his young fighter pilots off to war, he gave me a smart salute!

I almost burst to tears. It was deeply touching. No one ever did that to me before. Despite being more than ready to solo, I still felt a touch of trepidation so I returned the favor with a slightly shaky hand. Thank God he was too far away to see that.

Taxiing into position on the runway, I took a deep breath and firewalled the throttle causing the airplane to literally leap into the air. I remember thinking, “so this is what everyone means when they say the plane will bounce into the air without your instructor!”

Within seconds after takeoff, all the training kicked in and it was just another exercise around the airport pattern. The only difference was…well, I was alone.

After three takeoffs and landings, the venerable flight instructor waved me over and gave the signal to cut the engine. He stood there like a proud papa and motioned for me to go over to where he was standing. Instead of shaking my hand, he wrapped his huge arms around me and gave me a bone crushing hug. But, hey, I didn’t mind.

Five months later, one day short of my birthday, he finally signed me off to take my pilot certification flight test (i.e. “checkride”) with Mary Carpenter, one of the toughest but fairest FAA examiners from the area. He and Terry Ryan (his airplane co-owner at the time), both accompanied me on the flight to Pontaic airport, a mere 10 minutes away where the examiner’s office was located. He wanted to be there when Mrs. Carpenter and I were done with the checkride.

Two hours later, the examiner walked briskly into the waiting area, smiled and said, “Congratulations, Stephen passed with flying colors!”

Don roared his approval.

We all went out to have our pictures taken by the airplane and that’s when he said to me, “I’ll sit in the back seat on the return flight. Congratulations Mr. Pilot in Command!”

It was the greatest, grandest gesture another human being could ever have bestowed upon me. I’ll never forget it. He was that kind of man. Don believed in me so much that he was literally the only person at that airport who believed I would one day become the world’s first deaf instrument rated pilot.

Six years later, I did it, defying every naysayer in the aviation business. In February 06, I became the world’s first deaf instrument rated pilot. For that I salute Don Solms for believing in me.

Here’s to you Don!

Click here for his obituary. Note a small insertion in there about a “hearing impaired pilot.” Can you guess who that was?

Food for thought: Have you considered the power of the law of giving and helped make someone else’s dream come true this week?

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As a result of googling “Law of Attraction,” I stumbled onto a wonderful website whose name caught my eye: http://www.wingsfortheheart.com/

Can you guess why?

Hint: The key word is”Wings.”

You may recall that I’m a pilot. Not only that, but I’m heading up a book project for my church that happens to have “wings” in the working title: Wind Under Wings. Compelled, I opened the door to her website and was hooked. I ended up burning the midnight oil and read every single article she had on the subject of the “Law of Attraction.” I was so taken by her writing that I delved even deeper and that’s when I hit pay dirt.

On her site is a free e-book by Joe Vitale. Does his name ring a bell? It should. Long before the wildly successful “The Secret” DVD came out (he is one of the teachers featured), he was already famous for his best-selling book, “Spiritual Marketing.”

Joe has a most amazing story. For 15 years he lived in poverty in Houston, Texas. From there he rose to become a well known marketing guru with a special twist. Like me, Joe is an avid student of metaphysics. He is famous for harnessing spiritual and marketing principles together.

If you haven’t seen “The Secret,” you’ll love listening to him. Even though I can’t hear his voice (I’m deaf, remember?), I’ve heard that he has a hypnotic voice. People love listening to his tapes because they are so soothing and have a wonderful calming effect. He has the capability of inspiring people to action and touching their hearts because he is so genuine. There is nothing fluffy about this guy – in fact, I’ve put him on my list of people I desire to meet during my lifetime!

What I read stunned me.

The title of Joe’s e-book? The Greatest Money Making Secret in History!

It should have been titled “The Greatest Secret to Unblocking the Flow of Prosperity” but then which title holds greater emotional appeal?

Exactly.

It is 111 pages long. I read it in under two hours. I went to bed so excited, I couldn’t wait to write about it the next morning. I’ll give you the link to his e-book at the end but let me have the opportunity to share with you what I learned first:

1. You can never “out give” the universe. When you give from the heart and without any expectation of return, the universe returns the gift multiplied many times over.

2. Never, ever expect anything in return, especially from the beneficiary of your giving. Just know that you will receive. Sound confusing? It isn’t. Knowing and expecting are two different things. When you expect to receive, you put yourself in the “if I do this, I’ll get that.” That’s called manipulation. On the other hand, if you give without expecting any return, you put yourself in the mode of knowing you will get back but letting the universe handle the details for you. How exciting is that??

3. You may think you have little to give because of the current size of your bank account or debt situation but all you have to do is open your eyes and look. Even the little you have can be shared with others. Don’t wait until you have “a lot” to give away. Do it now and you’ll open up channels that were previously closed to you.

4. Sometimes the return from giving happens very quickly. Other times it takes longer. Never put a timetable on your return. Stay open and trust the universe.

5. Don’t give out of a sense of obligation or fear (i.e. people or organizations that prey on your sense of guilt or a preacher who says the bible demands that you tithe, etc.). Give with genuine gratitude. Give to people who inspire, heal, serve and love you.

6. In fact, the best time to give (especially when your bank account is extremely small and you do not yet have the financial abundance that you envision for yourself) is to wait until you are feeling GOOD. We all have our mood swings – we all have our ups and downs because that’s the natural ebb and flow of life. Sooner or later, you will be feeling really good about something for whatever reason. You will be inspired, motivated or given a ray of hope to the point where you are feeling very grateful. That’s the perfect time to give. When you give without any fear, attachment or expectation, you unlock the universal law of prosperity, making way for more to come back to you from unexpected sources.

7. The more you practice giving away, the more you stretch your prosperity consciousness. For example, in the last year and a half, I’ve made it a regular habit to tithe at least 10 percent of my income to people or places that provide me with spiritual nourishment. Lately, that recipient happens to be my church not because the preacher asks for it but because I feel grateful that I found a place where everyone is welcome, unlike many of the churches in this day and age. That, to me, is priceless spiritual nourishment. As a result, I give to my church because I want and feel inspired to, not because I have to. Huge difference.

8. When you give money away, you are sending a message to the universe that you are prosperous and in the flow. You also set yourself up as a money magnet – what goes out comes back.

9. The key principle is to know that you cannot fool or manipulate the universe – if you give grudgingly or out of pity or obligation, you are actually blocking yourself from the giving and receiving cycle. The underlying emotion when you give must be out of sense of love, gratitude and freedom. When you give, are you excited? Or are you fearful?

10. Give love, you get back love. Give time, you get back time. Give money, you get back money. Give books, you get back books. The universe mirrors exactly what you give out.

11. Here’s the greatest secret of unblocking the flow of your prosperity. How do you feel when you write checks? Do you cringe, get a funny feeling in your stomach? Let’s say you write a check for your church every Sunday. How does that make you feel? Have you ever asked yourself why you are writing this check? If you say: “I’m helping them out of a hole” or “I feel obligated” or “My preacher says I’ll go to hell if I don’t tithe,” you’re definitely on the wrong path. Not good. When you feel lousy giving money, you are sending a message to the universe that you are associating money with bad feelings. That’s like saying, “money makes me feel bad.” Have you ever thought of it that way? It’s mind-blowing!

12. Do people owe you money? Have you forgiven them? When you harbor anger or resentment against those who owe you, you are blocking yourself. Why don’t you just let them go? Silently bless them and know that you will be paid in full some other way.

13. How do you feel when you write a check to pay off your creditors? Just the other day, I wrote a check to pay off an invoice for videotaping services rendered for my speaking business. It was for a substantial amount, taking a large chunk of money out of my checking account. In the past, I would have felt fear in the pit of my stomach but on that day I actually felt exhilarated. Writing that check made me feel like a million bucks. It gave me a feeling of incredible inner peace because I could only imagine the look of surprise on the recipient’s face. Several months ago, he told me to take my time, trusting that I would eventually pay up in full. Never once did he complain or hold any grudges against me. He simply trusted that I would pay. When I finally had the money to pay him, I was feeling so incredibly thankful for his trust in me that while I was writing the check, I was actually feeling very excited! According to Joe Vitale, this kind of emotion is the back-door to unlocking your prosperity.

14. Become aware that the universe, God (or whatever label you want to put on it), is your main source, not your friends, your debtors, creditors, business associates, family, etc. Broaden your perspective and know that the universe will provide exactly what you need, ask and visualize for yourself.

15. Try giving anonymously. What a concept! What you give is between you and God and the universe anyway. Other people don’t need to know about it. Don’t give because you want your name up on some building or recognition to satisfy your ego. Why not surprise someone with an anonymous gift? True, you may never know how that person reacted because he/she won’t know it came from you. But put yourself in that person’s shoes. If you received a gift anonymously, how would that make you feel? Wouldn’t you sing your heart out or feel grateful? Sure you would! Why don’t you try that?

16. One of the contributing authors, Paul Hartunianin, in Joe’s e-book put it very concisely. I couldn’t have said it better than him: “I have no problem with someone being recognized for giving, he added. But if you give because you want recognition or you expect a ten-fold return, then you’re not giving, you’re calculating.” Wow! We humans sure know how to manipulate things, don’t we?

As promised, here’s the link to Joe’s e-book. I guarantee you’ll love it. You might even lose sleep over it!

Food for thought: Think of the person, persons or organizations that inspired you this week. Who made you feel good about your life, your dreams or your goals? Give money to that source and don’t be stingy. Come from the mindset of abundance, not scarcity. Give without expecting return from that recipient but know that you are setting yourself up for a return from some other source. And then watch what happens! You will be absolutely amazed.

(NOTE: In a future blog entry, I will list some things that have personally happened to me as a result of my “giving from the heart campaign.”)

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But herein lies the problem.

It is impossible to make everyone happy with the choices we make. If you worry about getting everyone’s approval, you’d never get anywhere. You’d be right where they some of them want you to be. If you’re not following your heart and achieving your dreams, well, that would be just fine with them!

When I made the decision to go from a safe, 9-to-5 clock-punching job at the bank to a career as a stockbroker at Merrill Lynch, I thought I would never hear the end of the comments some of these people were making like, “You’re crazy!” “You’ll never make it in this business.” Had I listened to them, I would not have gone on to enjoy a six-figure, award-winning career at the firm. I would never have known that I had what it took to make it in the securities business. You can read about an interview I had with them here.

The same thing happened when I made yet another stomach-turning decision to quit Wall Street to follow my dreams of becoming an inspirational speaker, writer and eventually pilot. In fact, the naysayers were out in full force!

Several years after I left Wall Street, I made the mistake of telling certain people about my dreams of becoming the world’s first deaf instrument rated pilot. They said, “Now, be realistic, it will never happen.”

One man, a flight instructor, even went out of his way to prove to me just how impossible that would be. He enthusiastically flipped through the pages of a large, thick book of FAA regulations. When he found what he was looking for, he gleefully pounded his finger on the page where it was written in black and white that two-way radio communication was required for the instrument rating. And then he laughed right at my face, vigorously shaking his head. I’ll never forget that day – it made me even more resolved than ever to achieve it.

Who do you think got the last laugh?

People who are two-faced, jealous or critical because of your success are those who have their own issues to grapple with. Their negative emotions usually have nothing to do with you. I know it’s hard, but you cannot take it personally.

What you may not be aware of is how fearful they are of moving forward and because of that, they are stuck in a rut – they don’t want to see you get ahead either. Perhaps they’re having financial problems so they don’t want to see you driving around in a new car, reminding them of their situation. Maybe they’re insecure with themselves and do not want to take responsibility for all the things they are attracting into their lives – so they pelt you with criticism because you happen to be the closest target. “Well meaning” people might even disguise their behavior behind the facade of “tough love.” Has any of this happened to you? Well, you’re not alone!

But let’s turn the tables on you for a moment. Were you passed over for a promotion? Did a friend inherit a large sum of money or win the lottery? Did someone you know get a fabulous career opportunity? Was your business acquaintance someone who was selected over you for a major contract? How did that make you feel? Were you jealous or genuinely happy for them? Be honest with yourself.

If you were jealous, it means deep down, you don’t think you can enjoy the same kind of blessings. According to the law of attraction, that’s like telling the universe you feel you cannot have what just happened to them. “Your wish is my command, ” is what the universe says in response.

On the other hand, if you are genuinely happy and excited for them, it means you intuitively know and understand that bigger and better things are in store for you too. You understand that God will reward you in time – it’s just a matter of due course. So why not celebrate the success of others while you wait for your turn? Wouldn’t you want them at your table, celebrating with you when that time came? Who wouldn’t? It’s no fun celebrating all by yourself!

This is why it’s so important to surround yourself with the right people. Last year I wrote an article on this. You can see it here.In short, the more successful you become, the more potshots that will sling your way. They are simply distractions. And when they arrive, it’s very tempting to get distracted from your vision and try to explain yourself or otherwise reason with them. But sometimes no matter how hard you try, they will not “get it” anyway. Realize that not everyone will want to celebrate with you at the table.

The very first lesson I learned about “energy wasters” came while I was a stockbroker at Merrill Lynch. The branch manager had transferred an elderly lady’s portfolio to my care. I soon found out why.At the time, I was a young rookie, eager to please, so I was thrilled to get her account. Every time she asked me to search for new investments for her portfolio, I was like an eager beaver, digging in and spending countless hours looking for the best possible solution only to have her reject my recommendations again and again. With an upturned nose she would invariably say, “That is just not good enough, keep looking!” Pretty soon I was expending all of my energy trying to please her at the expense of my other clients.

Eventually I got smart and realized how I was wasting so much precious time trying to win her over. I ended up “firing her.” Her account was transferred yet again to another unsuspecting stockbroker who had no idea of what was coming. The act of letting her go freed me up to assist those who genuinely wanted my advice.

Critics like her abound everywhere. I soon learned that lady was a bitter, unhappy person who had lost her husband and was living a lonely life somewhere in the city. Looking back, I remember when were first introduced. There she was, sitting there with a permanent scowl written all over her face along with a severely pinched forehead. She never smiled and complained about everything she could think of. Unfortunately, being a young, eager beaver, I never paid heed to the warning signs but there they were in extravagant display for all to see!

The lesson I learned is that you must pay heed to what’s in your heart, stay focused on your dreams and do not get involved with other people’s negative drama. It may be tempting to get down to their level and “fight the good fight” to win them over or even prove them wrong.

NO.

That’s not your job. That’s the universe’s job. Let God handle the naysayers for you.

The more successful you become, the more jealous and critical people you will encounter on the way up. You must learn to steer clear from them – love them at a distance. Do not let them embroil you in their drama. So what if they can’t see your vision? So what if they don’t like you? So what if they think you’re crazy for taking a certain course of action? It’s your life, not theirs! If they want to stay where they are, let them be. You must go on.

If a well-meaning person comes up to you and says, “Hey, I overheard so and so talking about you behind your back.” This would be a perfect time to put your hand up and say, “No, I don’t have time for gossip. I can’t control what people will say about me and it’s none of my business anyway.” Put a stop to it right then and there. That will stop the negative energy from snowballing and consuming you.

On the other hand, if someone starts to gossip about another person in your presence, you could put a stop to it and steer the conversation in a different, more positive and productive direction. Change the energy of the conversation and put some good energy back into it. Don’t become a “gossiper” – take the high road and let God handle the rest.

Food for thought: If you let what others think of you become your business, it will consume all of your time and energy, draining you of the ability to move on with your dreams. If God put a desire in your heart and it genuinely feels good, then no one can tell you otherwise.

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Today’s story is about the time when I applied for my very first car loan in 1998 after moving 1,000 miles away from New York City to work on a book project, which you now know eventually fell through because God had other plans for me (to learn how to become a pilot).

After looking at a few dealerships and being turned down for a car loan, I was at my wit’s end. I confided in a colleague about this and he gave me the name of a large Dodge dealership where he bought his Jeep from.

Upon setting foot in the showroom, I was met by a young, overly enthusiastic salesman named Jeff. He appeared fresh out of college, probably eager to make his first sale. What he didn’t know was that moments before walking in, I had an overwhelming impression to be upfront with whoever greeted me about my credit history (you know from previous articles that I had bad credit from being reckless during the early eighties).

As soon as we sat down, I immediately launched into the “bad debt” story. His shoulders sagged a little and I could tell he thought I was probably a lost case. But to his credit, he mustered a smile, saying he would do his best and asked that I fill out the necessary paperwork anyway. He then took my application and disappeared into the manager’s office, nestled somewhere out of sight, hidden from the public eye.

While waiting for Jeff to come back, I spotted a distinguished-looking salesman at the far end of the showroom. There was something magical about his appearance, desk location and mannerisms. For some inexplicable reason, I felt compelled to speak with him.

Glancing in the direction where Jeff previously made his departure and not seeing him anywhere, I decided to walk over and introduce myself to this man. Stopping a few feet from his desk, my eyes were immediately drawn to his nameplate.

Mr. Shoebottom.

“What a strange name,” I thought. “I never heard of that one before. It sounds like something right out of a children’s storybook.”

The man was on the phone. Seeing that I was standing there, waiting to speak with him, he covered the mouthpiece and said, “I’ll be right with you.”

Not wanting to distract Mr. Shoebottom any further, I went browsing around the showroom, while keeping an eye on him. As soon as he hung up the phone, I would dash over there.

Finally, he stood up and waved to me. As I was making my way over, I glanced once again to where I last saw Jeff. Seeing that he still had not returned from the manager’s office, I picked up my pace.

The friendly salesman reached out to shake my hand (rather firmly, I might add) and asked, “Sir, how may I help you?”

Peeking down at his nameplate once again to make sure I wasn’t imagining things , I said, “Mr. Shoebottom, my name is Stephen Hopson and I’m here to buy a car for the first time in my life. Someone recommended your dealership, which is why I’m here today. I filled out some paperwork and gave it to Jeff over there for processing. But, there’s one potential problem.”

“And what might that be?” he said pleasantly.

I pushed on, “Sir, I messed up my credit during the early eighties and although I’ve been cleaning it up the last few years, the credit check might reveal less than desirable information. To be honest with you, I’m a little worried about it.”

His face immediately changed from the detached, business-like expression to one of genuine understanding. The sudden transformation took me aback. I must have triggered something in him – I just didn’t know what. I would find out a few days later.

“Please have a seat, I’ll go see how Jeff is doing with your paperwork. I’ll be right back.”

It wasn’t long before Mr. Shoebottom appeared with the young salesman in tow. He was beaming as if he just made the biggest sale of the month.

“Mr. Hopson, your car loan was approved. Congratulations!”

It took me a second to gather my wits.

Not believing my eyes (remember I lip-read) I said, “WHAT!?!? I don’t need a co-signor or anything?”

“Your report did not have any history of bad credit like you thought it would.”Either he was telling me the truth and my credit history was actually clean OR he liked me so much that an exception was made to give me a loan without a co-signer.

A million thoughts rammed through my head. I remember thinking, if my credit was so good, then how come the previous 3 dealerships turned me down for a loan? It just didn’t make any sense.

Well, I’ll never know. And you know what? It doesn’t matter! It brings to mind a quote from Joel Osteen’s best-selling book, “Your Best Life Now”:

“God’s favor is opening doors of opportunity. His favor is bringing success in your life. His favor is causing people to make exceptions for you.”

When I went back to pick up my new car a couple days later, I was dying to ask Mr. Shoebottom (how can you forget that name?) what really happened.

With a warm, knowing smile, he said, “Several years earlier, I had experienced a very bad bankruptcy and know first-hand what it is like to be denied a loan because of bad credit.”Wow! That said it all. No wonder I felt strangely drawn to the man with a storybook name!

Food for thought: People who take a big risk to follow their dreams, move a thousand miles away and take a shot at being upfront about their personal situation are rewarded in a big way because God will cause you to be at the right time at the right place with the right people if you have the right attitude!

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