Welcome to Adversity University. I’m so glad we have Chris as our favorite connector in the blogging/Internet world. Thanks for coming by and for telling me you’ll be back. That’s great!

Yes, it’s about accountability and consciously shutting off that little tape recorder inside our heads. The first step is often a level of awareness.

Well, that’s an interesting observation but I would ask anyone who uses that line of thinking, “According to whom would define that other person being “hurt”?

Of course, there are obvious “hurts” but what about the subtle ones where some people could care less versus others who would be deeply hurt by the same situation? That could be a judgment call, I think.

“What if your lie could save a life” is not very hard to decide on. Like say someone who wants to cause physical harm to someone you know and asks where that person is. That’s where you could say, “I don’t know” when in reality you do know.

Great fodder for conversation here! You started a brilliant conversation here.

Hmm?

That was the most courageous, detailed account of your recent experience with “lies” or “white lies.” Thanks very much for sharing this with us. I know someone will one day read your comment and recognize himself/herself in the same situation.

You bring up an excellent point: “Are these outright lies or little white ones?” Very good point. Anyone out there want to comment on this? This makes for a great conversation.

Lie 1) A friend asked me to walk their dogs today at 5pm because their wife would be not getting home when they planned. ( actually, the wife and her brother got a piece of metal stuck in their tire on their way to Six flags and are getting the car fixed, BUT continuing on the Six flags and just would get home later cause they wanted to stay later based on what had happened to the car.) The favor involved getting a combination to a storage locker to get the apt key and then walking both their dogs separately. normally, I would not mind, but these folks always ask me to do things, like move furniture, paint etc, because I am out of work. I like them, but I lied and said I had plans and would not be around.

Lie 2) Another friend constantly calls me, emails me, texted me about…nothing. She just wants to talk. I like talking with her but can not do it every day /3X a day! She says always that everything is important and I have to get in touch with her ASAP. and then I find it is nothing more than a ploy to get me to call sooner. And if I do not call in a day or so, she will think something is wrong and call 14 times a day. I have told her the truth that she can not do this and I get busy and can not call back sometimes until a few days later. She never hears my words. So, yesterday, I emailed her and said I got a job and do not know all the hours and would call her when I could. This should give me a break from her constant nagging.
My insight into this is, that those white lies eventually will fade, the friend who wanted the dogs walked will get them walked somehow and problem solved and my other friend might ask about my job ( but she lives 1000s miles away) and I will just says ok and eventually get a real job and that will end that. but the toll it takes on the teller is my question. I feel bad and would the truth have been better? I dont know. Both friends would have pushed the point if I had just said “no” or “to stop calling so much”
So I am saying, a person has to be aware of the white lies they tell and that will form an inconsistency in their mental life. And are these really white lies or just lies? That is the question.

Thanks for your time,

How awesome it is to have you stop by and comment at Adversity University. I’m so excited to see you here.

I know EXACTLY how you feel when you say it feels great to have lost 30 lbs. As I mentioned in my article, I lost 20 and I couldn’t believe how much better I felt.

That leads me to the billion dollar question. If we know we feel good after losing weight or after a good vigorous workout, etc. why don’t we do it more often? Isn’t that something?

In other words, we KNOW we will feel better if we eat properly or worked out or did something we know we’re supposed to do but we don’t want to cross that threshold.

Amazing, isn’t it?

Anyway, I can also identify with the “rewarding of myself with food” kind of thing. OH YES. Count me in that crowd too. It’s funny - I’ll be shopping and I’ll see a delicious bag of chips or something and my mind would say something like “BUY THIS, you deserve to treat yourself to a bowl of…….” LOL

It’s good to know your “alternative eating lifestyle” is working where you don’t feel deprived. That’s the problem with most diets - we feel we’re neglecting ourselves because we deny ourselves what we crave.

Thanks for stopping in - it was really cool to have you write a very strong, powerful value added comment. I love it when people do that b/c it opens the way for more conversation - isn’t that what this is for?

Good to have you back here again! You present an interesting viewpoint - we are not created for something or someplace but for someone.

Can you elaborate on that a bit more? I find it a very interesting, thought provoking statement.

When you say “someone,” who do you mean? Someone else or do you mean the person him/herself?

Thanks for jumping in here.

SO MANY of us struggle with the weight/health issue!! I know I did. “I’m a single mom, who works, performs, rehearses, goes to school, volunteers, etc etc. I don’t have time to workout and I deserve to eat what I want.” I thought that I was rewarding myself with food, but in reality I was just hurting myself. The real reward to myself would be to actually take care of myself.

Finally, I’ve started putting myself first. Most of it is thanks to a great book called “YOU on a diet” by Doctors Roizen and Oz. I started eating by the standards set in this book and working out, and I’ve since lost almost 30 pounds! I feel SO GOOD and I don’t feel the least bit deprived. It really feels like a lifestyle and not a diet. I recommend getting this book on tape or CD because it’s not exactly a page turner unless you’re into reading a lot of medical jargon.

Thanks for sharing all of this! I hope to see you on Sunday!!